Recently I'm staying up until quite late, sometimes can up till 4am. I also not really sure what am I up to until so late. Surfing here, clicking there, scrolling back here, and I can't imagine myself just doing these simple actions for few hours, late at night.
Recently I'm having some friendship problem. This time not really about friendship, it's more towards a friend, specifically, a particular friend, who we used to mixed around. I have no idea, since when, we got no longer mix up with one another, no more usual lunch with course mates after class, no more dinner together after one or two dota games, no more late for classes due to waiting for the late woke up one, no more showing off of anything, no nothing.
I just had this momentum to write this post when I'm having dinner. I saw a group of junior walking in the cafeteria for their dinner, they were really in a big group, and kinda close to one another,chit chat in two big tables, which reminds me of the time when we were still close to each other, either my previous beginning mates, or the later ones. Some how, I suddenly has this thought, which I shouldn't have. Some how, I wonder, how long can their this close ship be last. To put it in a better words, maybe, I just wonder, how long more for this to change.
And just now, after dinner, I went for a meeting. I actually saw her, met her, heard her, and feel her, in some distant range. It's been quite some time, since the last time I saw her. It's kinda blur sight, since I didn't wear spec. She seems fine and okay. She seems going very well, with or without me. After broke up, what left behind, is just habit. Maybe after all, she can go back to her normal and usual life style, the time before I appear in her life. In the meeting, at certain point, I will pretend and make myself laugh out loud, really out and clear, making sure that she can hear that. At particular moment, I will just bring my face down and covered with my hand, when I'm thinking something.
Intentional laugh out loud, to tell you that I'm doing fine,
Intentional sad emotion cover, to tell you that I'm going nothing bad.
p/s: a bit cacat tho, I think of this quote originally in mandarin, and it's a direct translate kinda thing. =p
特地大声地笑，是为了让你知道我过得很好；
低头遮住烦恼，是为了
Good luck for the presentation tomorrow, although I cannot wish you by word it out, but I know, somehow, you can feel my wish.
Before I end this post, just wanna mention, that, in fact, I'm kinda miss you actually..
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